# The mathematics of new trails

I like math. I like it a lot. I won’t say I love math, because love should be reciprocated. Love should be returned in kind. Math? Math doesn’t have eyes for me.

I tried, hard, to find a way into math’s heart. You know those children? The ones who want to run fast? Faster than the wind, perhaps? Some of them have bow legs, or two left feet, or one leg shorter than the other. Or they have no feet, no legs at all.

When it comes to math, I am one of those children. I want to run fast, I have the impulse to turn and laugh at the wind at my back, but instead I wobble on crutches as I stare out over the racetrack.

I spent my childhood struggling to be better at math then I was able to be. I was not the sad, sexist-cliche of a girl afraid of math; I enjoyed reading fairly high-level books on mathematics, and some in sciences where those in the profession require math to speak about what they are working on with colleagues while dumbing it down in nearly useless languages like English or German or Russian for the rest of us, the goofballs.

At age twelve, Einstein was my idol, and my enemy. It’s said he failed math when he was a school boy, and still he accomplished so much with it. He changed how we see the world with it. That young Einstein was a math dunce is, of course, a lie from history. Einstein was a genius at math when he was a student. But when I was a student, I only knew the fiction.

It is statistically unlikely my efforts on Svbtle will go anywhere, much like my pursuit of math itself. But as I hope I’ve made clear, math and I have never been the best of friends. So, here I am. Why not?

Math forever.

Cheers.